when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize