Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
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