i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I wish i was in the wii world.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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