I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
