I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
