what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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