end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
