i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize