I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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