My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
