I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
