can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
