Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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