the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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