conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
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