okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
