so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize
