first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
