If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize