She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
