He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
