Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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