I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
