At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize