why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Randomize
