also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
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