i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
