I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Randomize
