bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
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