Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
