yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
