I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
We are all done wearing pants today
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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