I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
