i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
