Ambien. No doubt about it.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
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