haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
