I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Randomize
