And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
