The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
