i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
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