There is no way he is gay with that hair.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Randomize