Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
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That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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