i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
