shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
