i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
