He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
