i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
