so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
