he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I need help removing her.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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