The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize
