We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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